We’ve all had those nights where we’ve watched a little too much “Ancient Aliens,” but holy hell did one very drunk guy overdo it. On Monday, Oct. 5, police in Casper, Wyoming arrested a man for public intoxication who claimed to be a time-traveler sent to save humanity from aliens.
According to local news outlet KTWO-AM, Casper resident Bryant Johnson had a blood alcohol content of .136 but exhibited no clear evidence of alien abduction.
“[He] claimed he was from the year 2048, and was trying to warn the people of Casper that aliens were coming next year, and they should leave as soon as possible,” KTWO-AM notes. “Johnson told police the only way he was able to time travel was to have aliens fill his body with alcohol and have him stand on a giant pad which transported him to 2017, but he ended up in wrong year, and was supposed to be in 2018.” There is literally no way I could write those sentences better than KTWO-AM did, so I’ve left them perfectly in tact.
Inverse obtained Johnson’s redacted affidavit from the Casper Police Department. Unfortunately, it makes no mention of time-traveling, alien abduction, or any combination of the two:
Somehow, things for Johnson went from bad to worse. In addition to causing a scene in the emergency room of a local hospital, he apparently told cops he needed to speak to the “president of the town.” Casper, a city of 60,000 people, has no government official with such a title.
It’s unclear what inspired this drunken tirade, but let’s hope this whole sequence makes it into the next “Guardians of the Galaxy.” At the very least, we hope Johnson learned his lesson: alcohol-induced alien conspiracy theories are for Reddit, not real-life.
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